Autistic?

My girl…….what can I say. She had a very bad morning in the lunch department and it is partially my fault.

Let me digress for a second and explain some past.

After we moved in to this house we set up some early school routines so we would be able to have akin to a well oiled machine getting ready in the morning. We set up school bag racks and individual shoe spots as well as a breakfast bar where they can eat while I make and pack their lunches. It was all working very well. The kids loved the individual responsibilities and ride in their spots grew.

One morning I was packing her lunch and she cried. After what seemed like hours of non verbal squeaks and cries, I gleaned that her drink was standing on edge, not lying flat in her box. As soon as we “fixed” it she finished eating her breakfast and put her lunch in her bag. No lingering tears or anything, it was like the drink in the correct position switched her over to “cope” from total meltdown.

After school I asked her if she wants to pack her own lunch so she can make it right and we can save time and tears the next morning. She said yes and I explained I would put out the food she can have and she can place it anywhere in her box she wants. Yes, she understood and was quite excited.

Well, this morning I was pressed for time and space on the kitchen bench so I decided to place all her food on a plate. She could then fill her containers as she sees fit and we’d have no issues.

She has 2 little square boxes, 2 little round ones and a flat rectangle. She puts apple pieces in one, 5 tiny oreos in another, chicken flavoured rice crackers in a round one and green seedless grapes into a square one. I had all but the grapes on the plate and that is where the problem happened. The oreos are a little crumbly, they leave tiny black dots where they sit. The apple touched the oreos and got tiny little black dots on it.

20 minutes later she was able to vocalize the problem and we rinsed the apple and all was ok….until she went to put the chicken crackers into the other round one. This one was about 5 minutes of crying before she told me there were black dots in both containers and she can’t work out how they got into the one where the white rice crackers go into. I washed it and she filled it up.

By then, Sebastian, who had gone to catch the bus, came back home. The bus had left him standing at the corner because it was a different driver. So, in a way, she did me a favour. We would have already been on our way to school, unaware of Sebastian’s plight.

So, rice crackers fixed, everything packed as per her liking she was ready for school.

I packed all 4 into the car and off we went. Arriving at school we waited at the classrooms as normal. When the bell went and I stayed for her to sit in her line, she hid behind me. I still had to bring Matthew to class (no transport means he needs me to wait at his room too) and she wouldn’t let me go.

Crocodile tears ran down her face and she just looked at me and squealed, no talk at all. The teacher didn’t say much, she said it’s ok to take her to Matt’s class and bring her back.

As we walked away, she whispered through her tears, “Too many kids. There’s too many children in my class”

I saw, there were three new boys sitting in her line, what a lovely surprise to spring on her.

While I was figuring out what to do with her and how to tell the teacher, a beautiful teacher’s aide came up to us and said hello. In passing I mentioned Siobhan’s distress and told her that there are too many kids and she said “Well missy, you have never seen my office yet, have you!? Come on and I’ll show you the spot where I put the tadpoles your mum brought me once.”
Siobhan took her hand as she listened, I quietly let go and walked on with Matthew and when I looked back, she was holding the thermos for the teacher and happily walking away with her.

Now, I have an Autistic son who has some traits Siobhan exhibited but she has about 5 more severe ones that he NEVER had. I’ve been told she is copying his behaviour yet he has not had these issues for a very long time as we speak his language and he has not been distressed over them.

I have an Autistic girl struggling with life. Why is nobody else seeing this? What makes it so difficult to get a girl diagnosed? Why do they want to give her drugs when that was never mentioned with my son?

Sorry, no answers yet. However I am still here

With Love & Support,

Tarja Kelly

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